Scoreland Boobs

Hi, guys. Welcome back! This month, we’re going to a new club and then to one of my favorite clubs. It was a hectic two weeks, but as you are about to find out, I had a great time.

The Body Shop
Rock Island, Illinois

The Body Shop is a brand-new club that opened just six months before I got there. I really don’t like to go to new clubs because you never know what to expect. Sometimes it’s good to hear from other features that have been there so you know what you are getting yourself into. The only reason I agreed to go here is because it is owned by the same person who owns Big Earl’s Goldmine in Des Moines, Iowa.

This was my first time in Chicago. I’ve never featured there before. After I posted on my website CrystalGunns.com that I was going to Illinois, I got a lot of responses. I was a little nervous once I got there, but once I walked through the doors, I saw one of my friends who worked at Big Earl’s Goldmine. Her name is Cameo. I was all excited. I asked her what she was doing there, and she said that because I was featuring there this week, she decided to come down and work with me because she always makes money when I dance. Oh, by the way. She has big tits, too! During the day, Cameo and I hung out. We went to the gym, had lunch, went tanning and went shopping.

Well, I was happy. The Body Shop is a pretty nice place, and the best part about it is that it has a bar. Two bars! The dancers can only go topless, though, because alcohol is served. It’s a pretty big place that can seat a lot of people. The staff and the girls are very nice.

I featured there Wednesday through Saturday and did 12 shows all together. It was a pretty fun week. I met a lot of new fans who I didn’t know I had. One of my biggest fans drove in from Chicago to see me. His name is Carmine. Usually when I’m in Des Moines, he does the drive to see me, but he was excited to see me in Illinois. He stayed overnight in a hotel because he shot pictures of me for three hours in my hotel room. No, not for free! I charge him by the hour and have him sign contracts so he can’t sell the pictures. They’re only for his private use.

I must admit, Rock Island is beautiful. The scenery of the parks and the Mississippi River is beautiful. I’m not one to go out during the day because I like to sleep, but I did this time because the scenery was just breathtaking.

Friday turned out to be a very special night for me. I met a married couple that brought along a friend. The wife came up to me after my show and told me that her husband had been diagnosed with Lou Gehrig’s Disease and had been given only a year to live. He was a retired firefighter. Well, to make matters worse, the year was up. She asked me if I would take a Polaroid picture with him, and of course, I said yes. She didn’t want me to tell him I knew about his disease, and at first, I didn’t believe her. I thought she just wanted me to give her and her husband some attention. But when I went to their table, he was very sick. He could barely speak. The reason they came to the club was because he’s a big fan of big tits and knew me from SCORE.

Well, I ended up giving him free Polaroids and one of my newest SCORE covers signed to him. I ended up hanging out with them all night, and they were so fucking cool. I asked the wife a lot of questions. She was handling the situation so well and laughing all night. They’ve been together over 30 years and have two kids and grandchildren.

Well, as the night came to an end, I was starving. The other guy they were with was the wife’s brother, and he said he was a chef. They invited me back to their house for food. I was skeptical at first, but for some reason, I felt comfortable enough to go. I brought a friend with me, and you know what? I’m glad I went. We hung out until five in the morning and ate shrimp, and they barbecued turkey burgers. I must say, this was the proudest thing I have ever done. I learned so much about him and his disease. I will never forget this couple and how I made his dream come true by going back to their house and letting them take pictures of me. I will always keep them in my heart and prayers. They taught me a lesson about life: that it is not to be taken for granted. Enjoy the people you love every minute of the day. I dedicate this article to you, guys. You know who you are.

Big Earl’s Goldmine
Des Moines, Iowa

I left Rock Island and went right to Big Earl’s Goldmine. I had only one day off, Sunday, but actually, I had to drive two hours to Des Moines, so it wasn’t much of a day off!

The good part about it was that on the way, there was a huge outlet mall, and of course, you know I had to stop and shop for a couple of hours. Also, my friend Cameo was driving her car, so she stopped and shopped with me, too.

By now, all my fans should know that I love coming to this club. It’s a tough week because I have a six-day booking with 21 shows, but I have so much fun at Big Earl’s.

Tina is the lady who runs the club, and I have been featuring for her for the last six years, so she kind of lets me get away with murder. I usually don’t end up doing all 21 shows, but I do make a lot of money for the club. I had a lot of guys who came in to see me and buy VIP dances. That makes me and the club a lot of money. I must say, some of my favorite fans are at Big Earl’s.I must mention one of my fans. His name is Andy. He is a pilot for a private airline company. He always comes in about two or three times when I’m at Big Earl’s and hangs out with me. He has been doing that for the last four or five years. The best part is that on my last day there, he always takes me out for sushi. Andy hates sushi and always orders something else, but I always make him try a piece. I’m trying to convert him! Andy, I just want to say I love you and you are one of my best fans, and when you read this article, send me an email. Another reason that I love this place is because I truly love the girls there. Not only are they fucking hot, they are so nice. I know when I feature at Big Earl’s, I’m not only going to make a lot of money, I am going to party with my girls. Every time I’m in town, Elektra, who is a porn star (she dances there when she’s not on the road) and I go out on Wednesday and party our asses off. Tina owns a limo service, and she gives us a car to have for that night. I usually have three shows that night, but I only do one at around eight o’clock, then I’m out hitting the town around 10. This is what I mean when I say that the owners of Big Earl’s are cool. No club would let you miss two shows and give you a limo so you can go out and party. Well, that night, Tina gave us the stretch Hummer, and we had my favorite driver, David.

This time it was just me and Elektra. Summer, Sydney and crazy Ashton came, too. I was so surprised to see Ashton there because she lives two hours away and came by Greyhound bus just to party with me. Ashton used to dance at Big Earl’s before she moved. She’s one of my best friends out there. We used to get into so much trouble when we hung out. She likes to drink, like me, and every time we went out together, we would end up beating people up, and then the cops would be called! So we have nicknames. I’m Scrappy #1, and she is Scrappy #2.

Well, Elektra, who is the mom of the group, had her hands full that night. She had to babysit us. We went to the Liar’s Den and then The Loft. I got so drunk, I don’t remember much about that night, but I do have some pictures. The only thing I remember is doing shot after shot. The next morning, I woke up, and I was half-naked on Elektra’s couch. I know I must have had a great time!That’s it for this month. Please check out my schedule on my website CrystalGunns.com and come see my shows. Bring your friends too! And don’t forget to tell your favorite club to book me if they haven’t already! Have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!